Dawne of the Day

Beginning a new fortnightly series, aptly named Dawne of the Day. I am joined in The Crypt by the extremely wonderful Dawne Prochilo who will be giving her views and thoughts on all things sex toy related.

Dawne of the Day

Having done adult toy reviews for quite some time now, I like to consider every aspect of the review I present to possibly customers. When I first started, I wanted my reviews to stand out among the rest. Anyone can say, “Yes, I liked it.” or “WOW, it felt so good!” or even “I did not care for this product.”

I prefer to elaborate and let the consumers know exactly why I did or did not approve of the product. Now for the most, I have had excellent (if not explosive) releases from these reviews but every so often an incident occurs. I test each product to the best of my ability but sometimes...you get this one... it just leaves you wondering...WTF!

A (Dreadful) Moment of Passion Between a Reviewer and Her Toy

Driving home after an exhausting week at work, I knew exactly how I was going to relief the tension that had been building...with my newest toy review. It had arrived just days earlier and the Button Buster and me had a date tonight.

*Skip to the scene of the crime*

I eyed the mini-vibrator (which according to manufacturer's instructions was meant for external use). It didn't seem so intimidating, size didn't matter, right? I recalled one particular review I had read by another reviewer who had mentioned in passing about the Button Buster had 'accidentally' nipped a tender portion of flesh. Really? This little thing? Hmm... Thoughts began to evolve that weren't pleasant* But I had a job to do and I would do it.

Settling into a comfortable position (will not share that one with you, some secrets must be kept) and eyed the little white plastic contraption. How bad could it be? (Keep in mind, I have a collection of vibrators, some three times this diameter and four times in length). But images of explaining a painful situation continued lapsing through my head. Brushing those thoughts aside, I lowered my BB to the appropriate location.

Immediately the “buzz effect” took hold, more powerful than I could've ever fathomed. I jerked it back and shook my head. Yeah, it was that potent. Not even the word WOW could begin to describe this little magical wonder. Lowering it again, I graced my button again. EEK! Seriously? I pulled it back again, held it up to my line of vision and was speechless that such a tiny little item could be that potent and influential on my body.

I could definitely seeing myself telling an ER doctor, “but I was just trying to have an orgasm. I didn't think it would DO THAT!”...” I followed the directions. I really did. All I wanted to do was freakin' cum!”

So when you hear a person say size matters, listen. Omnipotent punches can come from small packages.